Tell me that it’s what I wanted
Dating someone really gives you a lot of different experiences.
This was the first time in my life that I couldn’t bear to watch something and ran out of the cinema.
It’s my fault for going to see the movie without saying anything, even though Norihiro had asked me not to if possible.
But I was only told not to watch it because there was a kissing scene, and I never imagined there would be such an intense love scene.
My friend said it was interesting so I couldn’t resist my curiosity, and went to see it with the naive idea that I could tolerate it if it was just a guy kissing an actress, but this is what I got.
To be honest, just the kissing scene was quite painful to watch, but taking off their clothes and hugging each other in bed was just too much.
Up until now I’ve projected myself onto actresses and fantasized about them, but now I can’t see them that way.
I can’t help but wonder, why is he touching other people even though he’s my boyfriend?
I understand that it’s acting in my head, but my feelings just can’t keep up.
Norihiro, who doesn’t know anything about my situation, contacted me as usual and today, as usual, came to my house and sat next to me.
Chai tea dissolved in hot water somehow seemed really cheap, and I wondered if that actress would have served something better.When I thought about it, even the drink that was supposed to be her favorite seemed really pathetic.
“Are you feeling a bit unwell today?”
“ehh……?”
“Your voice sounds weak, is something wrong?”
I thought I was behaving as usual, but it seems that it didn’t seem that way to Norihiro.
He looks at me with a worried look, and even though I’m happy, my heart feels unsettled.
The palm of his hand slowly reaches out to my cheek, and even though it’s the same as always, I can’t help but think that somewhere he’s comparing me to other women.
A scene from the movie came to mind, and I found myself saying something pointless: Norihiro looked so much sexier and more natural then.
Even though we weren’t actually doing it, he kissed me in such an erotic way that I thought we were hugging each other.
Why does she not know that Norihiro touches me like that, even though she is me?
Once I started thinking about it, I couldn’t stop, and shameful feelings just spilled out of my mouth.
“…Norihiro-san, do you have work tomorrow?”
“Huh? From noon. You can take it easy in the morning.”
He asks me what’s wrong, but I think Norihiro probably understands what I’m trying to say.
I’ve never asked him about the next day’s plans when he’s at my house, and there’s a slight warmth to his hand as it slowly slides over my cheek.
How did they invite her in the movie?
No, I don’t think he invited her. It was the man who invited her to bed.
I don’t know how to seduce someone, so I’m not very good at it, but I want them to touch me like that too.
“…If it’s okay with you, Norihiro, why don’t you come and stay the night at my place today…?”
My voice trembled.
It’s a clumsy way of inviting someone and not even a little bit sexy.
I’m embarrassed that I didn’t do it well, but I’m sure Norihiro could hear me just fine.
“…Is that an invitation?”
In the slightly quiet air, the only sounds that could be heard were the sound of my own breathing and Norihiro’s voice.
There’s no point in running away here.
“…That’s right.”
The answer she forced out of her embarrassment was one that Norihiro took action the moment he heard it.
As soon as my mouth was covered forcefully it became deeper, and even though I wanted to run backwards I couldn’t move as the back of my head was held down.
It was the longest and deepest I’d ever felt. Unable to escape, my tongue entangled itself and I could feel saliva overflowing from the corners of my mouth.
“Kihi, ro… sa.”
“I didn’t think you’d invite me.”
“Well, as long as you don’t mind, it’s fine…”
“I don’t mind at all, I’m happy. I knew you had no experience, so I was planning to wait.”
Just when I thought his mouth had left my mouth, I was immediately hugged tightly from the front, unable to move and unable to see his expression.
Just like that, I was carried naturally to the bed and lowered down, then covered with him so as to block my escape.
I didn’t want to look so I looked away so I don’t remember much, but I felt like he was kissing my neck and slowly stroking my head, and touching me in a way that was more gentle than the way he acted in the movie.
“…Um, do you, do you not need a shower or something?”
“Yeah, I don’t need it.”
“Uh, uh… well, um…”
“I want to hold you, okay?”
His direct manner of speaking made me want to run away for just a moment, but I couldn’t back out now so I slowly nodded.
Her eyes narrowed in delight as she drew closer, and her hot breath melted at close range.